Security

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Welcome to Security

A message from Jim Boutcher

Security. What’s that all about anyway? In my mind, it’s a freedom from fear and anxiety.

When that Great Scientist in the Sky invented us humans, however, he managed to cross a couple of wires. Fear and anxiety aren’t conditions most people can free themselves from. They’re the two qualities that drive us to action. Why do you go to work every day? Why don’t you cheat on your husband or wife? Why do you lighten the pressure on the accelerator every time you pass a cop?

Fear of pain. Fear of God. Fear of death. Without fear and anxiety, people wouldn’t exist. They’d have no motivation, no will to action.

 

That would be fine and dandy if we were living in some kind of pinko utopia, but wake up brothers and sisters, that’s not where we’re at. We’ve got a company to run, families to feed.

Now fear and anxiety, left to float around on their own volition, don’t make for an effective workplace. It’s our job in Internal Security to focus the fears, funnel the anxieties. Make the employees scared of sabotage. Of one other. And most importantly, of us. If we can control their emotions, the ship runs a little smoother, and we’re all better off because of it.

So take the time to read through these pages. Acquaint yourself with the current projects. Memorize the hot sheet. Maybe find a few suspects of your own.

 

I’ll be watching you,

Jim

Hot Sheet

These are the employees we’d like to keep an eye on this week…

Davis, Kevin. Doesn’t seem to be taking recent breaches in security with enough seriousness.

Preston, Jason. Has expressed suspicions about his immediate supervisor James Saunders. Might be a ruse to shift attention from his own activities.

Saunders, James. One of his co-workers suspects him of attempting to hack into the Restricted Access Area. And the amount of late night hours this guy spends laughing to himself is enough the creep even me out.


Current Projects

Operation Apprehension

Create false sabotage threats, encourage beefed-up Security presence.

Like so many of my other great ideas, Operation Apprehension came to me while I was in the shower. Hearing a noise in my apartment (a comprehensive reconnaissance later turned up a hinge in need of oiling), I realized that all that separated me from that big, scary world out there was a vinyl polymer shower curtain only a couple of millimeters thick.

While my feeling of naked exposure was quite literal, I correctly realized that everyday folks must feel like this fairly often on a more metaphorical level. A wellspring of irrational terror poking around under a thin veneer of calm. If I could only exploit it…

And I have. I make it a point to create a little paranoia within the work environment each and every day. Sometimes I’ll steal a pen from someone’s desk. Or start a rumor about a particularly nervous employee. Maybe even let a dinosaur out of its pen – you can’t do better than a the anxiety of sabotage.

You’ll be amazed at how fast these small little things cumulate into something tangible. And when it’s tangible, you can control it…


Operation Beeswax

Encourage employees to report the suspicious behavior of their co-workers.

Ever walk up to a fellow employee, hard at work at some project or another, and sneak a peek at whatever he or she is doing?

Maybe it’s a pathetic need for reassurance. Maybe it’s just nosiness. The point I’d like to make is that regardless of what causes it, it’s a reflex action. People just can’t help themselves when it comes to meddling in each other’s business.

My theory has always been to exploit whatever truisms the world has to offer. If people are going to be constantly checking on their neighbor, let’s use it to our advantage.

Operation Beeswax is a concerted effort to encourage people to rat out their neighbors. (As if they needed it!) How do we do this? Well, flat out asking them is a good start. But the sharp angle is to create an environment where people will want to tell. Where they’ll feel like heroes, maybe even get rewarded for doing so.


Operation Clean Sweep

Develop and implement methodology for terminating unpopular animals with “inexplicable causes.” Current subject: Brachiosaurus.

Some folks claim that crisis is one and the same as opportunity.

Well, a lot of people will talk that Sun-Tzu load of horse manure until their ears are spouting fertilizer, but I’ll tell you one thing: most people don’t like problems, and will avoid them at all costs. And when they find themselves actually confronted with one, they’ll sweep it under the rug and pretend it doesn’t exist.

John Hammond, our illustrious president, is no different from most in this respect. It’s become especially evident in the way he’s handled InGen’s two most unpopular dinosaurs, the Brachiosaurus and the Velociraptor.

We all know the reasons why these two creatures aren’t working out at Jurassic Park. To his credit, Hammond initially tried to deal with the matter at hand. He seemed pretty confident that he could pawn them off on some unsuspecting zoo as curiosities. When that didn’t work, he got creative. Maybe he could sell the Raptors as guard dogs to some Marxist dictatorship. No dice, deeper desperation. Could he sell the Brachiosaurus meat to some starving Third World country? A better idea, but when the logistics of moving an 80 ton dinosaur got discussed, well, let’s just say it’d be cheaper to try to feed all of Cambodia with Big Macs.

The real answer to this little conundrum finally dawned on Mr. Hammond. And what do you know, he didn’t have the stomach for it. So much for Sun-Tzu.

So it’s up to Security to rid the Park of these creatures. Only keep it simple, and more importantly, keep it quiet.

The end result, of course, is Operation Clean Sweep. Some friends of mine in the military (and I don’t mean the Armed Forces – you’d never catch these guys swearing allegiance to a country unless there was some angle to be played) turned me on to a host of nerve gases that can be made from the ingredients you find in commercial fertilizer. Sodium Fluoride. Sodium Cyanide. Phosphorus Trichloride. Acetonitrates. Sure, Uncle Sam keeps tabs on who’s buying what when it comes to this sort of thing, but when you’re ordering chemicals for a Park the size of Jurassic, it’s easier than you think to slip things by.

So far, we’ve been “treating” the Brachiosaurus with decent-sized doses of Sarin, the same nerve gas that guy used on that Japanese subway a couple of years back. And the results? Well, nobody can seem to figure out the “mysterious plague” that’s killing these things off. And for the most part, no one really cares.

The Raptors will probably be a tougher foe, but hell, what’s life without challenges?


Operation Fall Guy

Identify potential scapegoats for various misdeeds. Gather establishing “evidence.”

I grew up in a family with a whole mess of brothers and sisters, a father with a drinking problem and a two-inch wide leather belt, and a mother who was too tired to care. When you live in that kind of environment, you learn one thing right quick:

Never take the blame for anything if you can lay it on someone else.

Sometimes you can find a Fall Guy by accident. But don’t count on it. The shrewd player will choose the mark in advance. Cultivate a relationship. Sow the seeds early, and you’ll reap some hefty benefits down the line.


Operation End Run (Contact Jim)

Initiate plan (if all else fails) to embarrass and discredit a certain “high-level” executive.


Operation Provide Comfort (Contact Jim)

Implement cash payments to settle wrongful death claims and other public relations problems related to (unspecified) incidents during initial research.

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